the-absolute-funniest-posts:

blameitonalex:

The Defibrillator Toaster

My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”

“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!!  NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”

He’s bread, Jim.

Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M

If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast! 

JESUS CRUST.

JAM IT!

“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”

LMFAO ^^

Follow this blog, you will love it on your dashboard

(Source: secretsbest)

katyperrydaughter:

(Source: mikedaoo)

READING THE HUNGER GAMES TRILOGY

1stdandelionoftheyear:

The Hunger Games:

Beginning:

Middle:

End:

Catching Fire:

Beginning:

Middle:

End:

Mockingjay:

Beginning:

Middle:

End:

(Source: sparks-onfire)

playerprophet:

plaidninjaturtle:

theamericankid:

“Wow Mr. Balloon, we’re going to have so much fun together.” POP “Hey, Mr. Balloon are you okay? Wha- what the, OHMYJESUSSWEETMOTHEROFGOD?!”

WHY!? The timing..!

I don’t think I can NOT reblog something that made me laugh so hard.

THE COMMENTARY

mariekathcunt:

daylighters:

A dramatic reading of some girl on facebook

Yes

(Source: houkagos)

thebubblyblonde:

mass-destruction:

cuemypulse:

iamsuperbat:

offmytitsonhappiness:

Can we just stop and appreciate Nicki Minaj’s face for a moment. She looks genuinely very concerned for Josh here, like she thinks he was actually in an arena full of kids trying to kill him, and is confused as to why no one else finds this as shocking as she does.

What do you expect? People from the Capitol just don’t understand.

People from the Capitol just don’t understand.

People from the Capitol just don’t understand.

People from the Capitol just don’t understand.

(Source: mrsannieodair)

forgiveandalwaysremember:

epic-humor:

(Source: breadpao)

hybridcomplex:

t92marihoene:

littlestarlolo:

ezios-vitals:

limiculous:

Yes, it’s violin. With dubstep.

WHAT IS THIS EARGASM I AM HAVING

Just now I listened to this while I leaning out of my bedroom window, gazing at the night sky. There are no clouds tonight, just a clear view of the great big universe and so many beautiful, beautiful stars. It wa awesome and I had tears in my eyes because of reasons.

I’ll listen to this song a lot tonight. Sniffle.

rooroo7:

zombieinmybutt:

dez15:

cakeandotheredibles:

a-fookin-rocket-scientist:

aridoctari:

hetalianpolyglot:

himapapaftw:

pockytardis:

raccoonception:

samalame:

I’m laughing at my desk right now.

…………………….

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w h A T

no

what the shit

why did i start laughing

Well then

Seems legit.

Excuse the living fuck out of me?

what the actual fuck?

OH MY GOD

for fucks sake. seriously, what the fucking fuck